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  • [Alexandria] 2 December 1884

        My dear Constantine,       I have already acknowledged your letter 7th Nov-
        ember and postscript 11th id. and now I am in possession of yours     20th November to hand this morning only. I am as you may     believe extremely obliged for your kind and interesting     communications and am pleased to see you do not take     offence at my occasionally protracted silence: as I     have often explained ’tis what I can do nothing to avoid.     Even now you will hardly believe I write from the office     time 1.30 pm after all have gone and with an hour     to spare to write to my beloved brother. I cannot in     terms sufficiently expressive express to you the heartfelt     sympathy I bear for mother and you all at Constantinople.
        I need not read your letters to know that it were     God’s gift indeed to bring about some remedy to our     needy and deplorable circumstances? I need not     really but then is prayer also a dream? Are prayers     unavailing? It would seem so in the sorry life we     lead without immediate prospect of relief anywhence.     I would not trouble you with the unpleasant des-     cription of our existence here; a pretence, a blind
        as it has ever been with all of us. The continual     stint and abnegation of the utmost necessaries: the     necessity of putting on a smiling face and contented a     ppearance when misery and doubt lurk gnawing



  •     at the heart. To me, I tell you truly, what to others is     a pleasure, is sad distress: say now as is the fact
        I am invited to spend a few days with Moss in     Ramleh, I go reluctantly and not to displease him;     for is there not one’s shabby apparel to be ashamed     of, the ragged shirts that are wellnigh threadbare at     the sleeves and collars with constant manipulation of     the scissors to cut the shirtings: the knee-bulging     trousers, the stained and glittering coat, and alas! worst     of all, the mock-pretence the shabby genteel demeanour     that one must necessarily adopt. But there,     I have said enough: you are three times
        worse placed than I, and God forbid that I should     ever self-deplore when those who are nearest and     dearest to me are so much to be pitied. “Do the     duty that is nearest unto thee” says the Holy     Book, and may we all be graced by Heaven with power     to do that duty well and trust to Him for succour.     And poor Paul has been ailing? Give the dear     boy my sincere love and hearty congratulations     at his convalescence. I can well imagine our
        mother’s distress at the illness of any of us, I can     imagine the sore need for help in such a time, I     say I can picture all this vividly to myself, and     yet despair that I can do nothing to alleviate     the misery. Pray tell Alexander and Paul not     to nurture any illfeeling against me for not     writing to them: I love, esteem and respect them






  •     as ever, but ask them to bear with me, for we all     have our troubles, and to accept the messages I send     them through you as if they were sent direct in     all loving-kindness and solicitude. I said there     was no immediate prospect of relief: and yet who     knows? with the beginning of next year we may     be better off. I am sure to have an increase of     salary, and Peter too I hope: then if Aristides     could pay off his debt (poor fellow! he works hard     enough) and do better, all might yet be well: and
        the payment of the Indemnities see us all united     here again early in the coming spring. Moss is     kind, Moss is good, but Moss shall not have     my services any longer after the expiration of this     year, unless at a higher premium. I am     confident I am worth something to the business     and that something must become palpable     to the touch ere I allow my time and life to be     wasted in the dogged wretchedness of office-life:     for wretchedness it is, work of a beast of burden
        out of which (as business goes now-a-days)     the most must be got for the least money ― But     hope, hope that the glorious rise of some orient     sun may yet blaze forth and scatter the gloomy clouds     from around us and give us a peaceful day!




  •     You say there is no news from George. He may not     fare so well and thus shrink from writing, not that     it is an excuse to leave one’s dearest unadvised,     but it is a sorry to ask to write unpleasant things.     So I feel it: hence my desire that you should not     be disturbed with other than your own difficulties.     Enclosed you find a cheque in Paul’s name of     £18: the £8 are from Aristides, and the rest mine     and Peter’s miserable sparings. ― You ask news of     my poetical inclinations: how say that I but     rarely indulge? The sparks of the fire-flame are
        easily extinguishable at the blast of the North wind.     I am not joking. What say you? Can the tree     bear fruit in an uncultured soil? and how cul-     ture the latter when both time and disposition are     lacking? I have imagined this: that poetry     is not the outburst of impassioned words, but     rather the sublimity of inward feeling: hence     the poetry and prose of all song: in the early     Spring time, as of old, the goddess lures the unwary,     bids them tell what is inexpressible: but then
        times change, the insanity of this world’s life pas-     ses, the prose of song in all its rigidity kills     the weakly daring, for how in man’s framed speech     tell fitly the tumultuous exuberances of Nature’s     wilderness? Enough and too much. ― I send you     under separate cover a list of the words you     have sent me for translation into Greek: I have




  •       done my best. Give dear mother many    many kisses for me, ask her to keep up her    spirits, for the sake of all of us           and believe me                Yours devotedly                     John

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DIGITAL OBJECT DESCRIPTION

IDENTITY AREA

REFERENCE CODE:
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GR-OF CA CA-SF02-S01-SS02-F20-SF001-0055 (430)
TITLE:
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Letter by John Cavafy to C. P. Cavafy
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2/12/1884
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Item
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44 x 27.5 cm

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Handwritten letter by John Cavafy to C. P. Cavafy on two double sheet letterheads of R. J. Moss & Co., Alexandria. The sender describes the difficult work conditions and the poor financial situation of himself and his brothers as well as the psychological consequences of these conditions. He expresses, however, his optimism for the immediate future as well as his disappointment because he cannot find time to engage in poetry. (Alexandria)

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English

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Writing in ink. Watermark: R. J. Moss & Co., Alexandria. Physical item wear: oxidations.

NOTES AREA

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The transcription and editing of the letters of John Constantine Cavafy addressed to C. P. Cavafy was first carried out by Katerina Ghika; said transcriptions were subsequently uploaded to the official website of the Cavafy Archive.

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At the end of the letter, John refers to the dεspatch of a list of Greek words translated into English, as requested by C. P. Cavafy.

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Metadata in machine-readable format

DOI: 10.26256/ca-sf02-s01-ss02-f20-sf001-0055
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PERSONAL PAPERS
Correspondence of C. P. Cavafy
Family correspondence
Incoming correspondence of C. P. Cavafy
Incoming correspondence by John Cavafy